When I began this Lenten Journey I offered a prayer given by Henry Nouwen.  In it he states, “I know that Lent is going to be a very hard time for me.  The choice for your way has to be made every moment of my life.  I have to choose thoughts that are your thoughts, words that are your words, and actions that are your actions.  There are no times or places without choices.  And I know how deeply I resist choosing you.”

I have been keenly aware of these words, keeping them at the forefront of my mind as I encounter the world on a daily basis.  Sometimes that world can be very hateful, spewing unnecessary demeaning words, taking actions meant on division and destruction.   We are such a divided people, in religious attitudes, political views, and so many other ways.  I tolerate political hatred and division but I don’t like it.  I feel I have no other choice but to tolerate, else I would spew my own anger which would not help matters.  But when it comes to the matters of Christian attitudes and actions, I cannot simply tolerate for to me it is my very life, my existence in every meaning of the word.  To choose words that are His words, thoughts that are His thoughts and actions that are His actions, requires of me, a dedicated prayer life.  I am not always successful.

These past weeks have been a struggle for me as I have encountered a heavier dose of adversity and I find my desire to choose “thoughts that are His thoughts” quite the challenge.  I have found my actions and words easier to control.  But I do not like that my thoughts have “a mind of their own”.

Through prayer I have been getting a sense of the direction I should be going.  Stepping over resentment is oh so difficult and is my greatest struggle at this time.  But if I am to continue on this journey, to continue to grow toward sanctification and to obey Christ, to be like Him, I must defeat this foe.

As Christ was enduring the mocking, the beatings, the long walk to Golgotha with the added burden of the weighted cross, (until lifted by Simon) what were His thoughts?  We know He humbled Himself; He did not strike back with words or actions.  What were His thoughts?   Very few words are spoken by Jesus as He hung in unimaginable pain; these are the most powerful, “Father, forgive them for they don’t know what they are doing.”  (Luke 23:34 NLT)

Forgiveness, then, is the answer?  Forgiveness even when the offender doesn’t seek it?  That would be Christ’s model.

Today I read from my devotional book these words from Henry Nouwen.  “God’s forgiveness is unconditional; it comes from a heart that does not demand anything for itself, a heart that is completely empty of self-seeking.  It is the divine forgiveness that I have to practice in my daily life.  It calls me to keep stepping over all my arguments that say forgiveness is unwise, unhealthy, and impractical.  It challenges me to step over all my needs for gratitude and compliments.  Finally, it demands of me that I step over that wounded part of my heart that feels hurt and wronged and that wants to stay in control and put a few conditions between me and the one whom I am asked to forgive.    This stepping over is the authentic discipline of forgiveness.”

When I have asked God to allow me to lead a Christ-like life, I expect the hard road.  Christ’s actions and words were not that of society, his thoughts were not his own, but those of His father.  If my heart is true in its desire then I will take the hard road and I will do so on my knees no matter how wounded they become.

God loves you!

As I begin my journey through the Lenten season, I awake this morning knowing immediately what it is I must do. Prayer, oh yes but I wanted something to set my mind in focus. When normally I would reach for my Bible, today, I was looking for a different guide. I stooped to look under the bed where I knew I would find one of Rick’s many devotional books. One in particular caught my eye and it just happens to be exactly what I was looking for (unbeknown to me at that moment). It is titled, ‘Eternal Seasons; A Spiritual Journey through the Church’s Year’ by Henri J.M. Nouwen. I offer this prayer as it is tugging at me hard.

Dear Lord Jesus,
Today the Lenten season begins. It is a time to be with you in a special way, a time to pray, to fast, and thus to follow you on your way to Jerusalem, to Golgotha, and to the final victory over death.

I am still so divided. I truly want to follow you, but I also want to follow my own desires and lend an ear to the voices that speak about prestige, success, human respect, pleasure, power, and influence. Help me to become deaf to these voices and more attentive to your voice, which calls me to choose the narrow road to life.

I know that Lent is going to be a very hard time for me. The choice for your way has to be made every moment of my life. I have to choose thoughts that are your thoughts, words that are your words, and actions that are your actions. There are no times or places without choices. And I know how deeply I resist choosing you.

Please Lord, be with me at every moment and in every place. Give me the strength and the courage to live this season faithfully, so that, when Easter comes, I will be able to taste with joy the new life which you have prepared for me.

I offer this in your name, Amen.

I love Easter for with it comes Spring; new life, warmer temps, flowers blooming, trees coming alive again. I like getting outside playing in the dirt as I prepare my flower beds in order that they grow vibrant and healthy. If I don?t prepare their soil properly, they won?t grow properly, if at all.

How appropriate it is that the season of Lent coincides with Spring for it too involves preparation; the preparation of our lives for the resurrection of our Christ. As we began the Season of Lent, Rick asked me what I would be giving up this year. I told him, “self”. For me, Lent is a time I take to seriously consider my attitude, my actions toward others, my “love level”. In other words, I ask myself how much closer I am to having the spirit of Christ than the previous year and what do I need to do to attain that? Christ was certainly selfless in all he did. It requires a lot of prayer, a lot of self examining, a lot of truth finding about the self. It is an act of preparing in order that my soul grows vibrant and healthy.

Self denial…the deliberate refusal to satisfy ones desires, as a method of disciplining oneself or making it possible to help others. Resurrect…to bring back to life, to bring back to memory or into use Vibrant…full of life and energy As we are nearing Easter and I look back upon this lent season I have to say that I could’ve done better, but I did better than the previous year. Of course, it is all just the beginning and doesn’t end with Easter, for Easter is the time of resurrection.

The next time you?re out working in your yard, ask yourself how you are preparing your life for vibrant growth. Is your life full with the love of Christ or is it lying dormant in need of some care?

God loves you immensely!

Tracie