When I began this Lenten Journey I offered a prayer given by Henry Nouwen.  In it he states, “I know that Lent is going to be a very hard time for me.  The choice for your way has to be made every moment of my life.  I have to choose thoughts that are your thoughts, words that are your words, and actions that are your actions.  There are no times or places without choices.  And I know how deeply I resist choosing you.”

I have been keenly aware of these words, keeping them at the forefront of my mind as I encounter the world on a daily basis.  Sometimes that world can be very hateful, spewing unnecessary demeaning words, taking actions meant on division and destruction.   We are such a divided people, in religious attitudes, political views, and so many other ways.  I tolerate political hatred and division but I don’t like it.  I feel I have no other choice but to tolerate, else I would spew my own anger which would not help matters.  But when it comes to the matters of Christian attitudes and actions, I cannot simply tolerate for to me it is my very life, my existence in every meaning of the word.  To choose words that are His words, thoughts that are His thoughts and actions that are His actions, requires of me, a dedicated prayer life.  I am not always successful.

These past weeks have been a struggle for me as I have encountered a heavier dose of adversity and I find my desire to choose “thoughts that are His thoughts” quite the challenge.  I have found my actions and words easier to control.  But I do not like that my thoughts have “a mind of their own”.

Through prayer I have been getting a sense of the direction I should be going.  Stepping over resentment is oh so difficult and is my greatest struggle at this time.  But if I am to continue on this journey, to continue to grow toward sanctification and to obey Christ, to be like Him, I must defeat this foe.

As Christ was enduring the mocking, the beatings, the long walk to Golgotha with the added burden of the weighted cross, (until lifted by Simon) what were His thoughts?  We know He humbled Himself; He did not strike back with words or actions.  What were His thoughts?   Very few words are spoken by Jesus as He hung in unimaginable pain; these are the most powerful, “Father, forgive them for they don’t know what they are doing.”  (Luke 23:34 NLT)

Forgiveness, then, is the answer?  Forgiveness even when the offender doesn’t seek it?  That would be Christ’s model.

Today I read from my devotional book these words from Henry Nouwen.  “God’s forgiveness is unconditional; it comes from a heart that does not demand anything for itself, a heart that is completely empty of self-seeking.  It is the divine forgiveness that I have to practice in my daily life.  It calls me to keep stepping over all my arguments that say forgiveness is unwise, unhealthy, and impractical.  It challenges me to step over all my needs for gratitude and compliments.  Finally, it demands of me that I step over that wounded part of my heart that feels hurt and wronged and that wants to stay in control and put a few conditions between me and the one whom I am asked to forgive.    This stepping over is the authentic discipline of forgiveness.”

When I have asked God to allow me to lead a Christ-like life, I expect the hard road.  Christ’s actions and words were not that of society, his thoughts were not his own, but those of His father.  If my heart is true in its desire then I will take the hard road and I will do so on my knees no matter how wounded they become.

God loves you!

During this season of lent we are given the opportunity to experience something other than in our normal everyday lives; to experience something other than ourselves.  We are invited to give up a part of ourselves that we would otherwise be dependent upon, or to cling.  We are invited to experience the other possibilities in our self.  In that process (those 40 days) we begin to suffer over the loss of the familiar.  So often times it is much easier to continue clinging to old ways, to continue dependence on the familiar, to snuggle in the blanket of false security.

In the 10th chapter of the book of Mark, verses 17-22, we read of a man who wanted to experience something other than his self.

“Good Teacher, what must I do to inherit eternal life?”  Jesus said to him, “Why do you call me good?  No one is good but God alone.  You know the commandments: ‘You shall not murder; you shall not commit adultery; you shall not steal; you shall not bear false witness; you shall not defraud; honor your father and mother.’”    He said to him, “Teacher, I have kept all these since my youth.”  Jesus, looking at him, loved him and said, “You lack one thing; go, sell what you own, and give the money to the poor, and you will have treasure in heaven; then come, follow me.”  When he heard this, he was shocked and went away grieving, for he had many possessions.”

Jesus, whom loved this man, offered him new life.  But the man first had to give up the part of him that was surely to stand in the way, and he couldn’t do it.  He could not give up what he already knew was not permanent, for what he sought was ETERNAL LIFE.  Did he choose instead to wait for another day, to wait for something else, another offer?  Did he think he could just continue day after day after day to live the familiar?  Did he not really believe in what Jesus offered him?  Maybe he just couldn’t comprehend what Jesus was offering?   The man left in grief and shock, turning his back to Jesus choosing other securities, the familiar. Read the rest of this entry

I love Easter for with it comes Spring; new life, warmer temps, flowers blooming, trees coming alive again. I like getting outside playing in the dirt as I prepare my flower beds in order that they grow vibrant and healthy. If I don?t prepare their soil properly, they won?t grow properly, if at all.

How appropriate it is that the season of Lent coincides with Spring for it too involves preparation; the preparation of our lives for the resurrection of our Christ. As we began the Season of Lent, Rick asked me what I would be giving up this year. I told him, “self”. For me, Lent is a time I take to seriously consider my attitude, my actions toward others, my “love level”. In other words, I ask myself how much closer I am to having the spirit of Christ than the previous year and what do I need to do to attain that? Christ was certainly selfless in all he did. It requires a lot of prayer, a lot of self examining, a lot of truth finding about the self. It is an act of preparing in order that my soul grows vibrant and healthy.

Self denial…the deliberate refusal to satisfy ones desires, as a method of disciplining oneself or making it possible to help others. Resurrect…to bring back to life, to bring back to memory or into use Vibrant…full of life and energy As we are nearing Easter and I look back upon this lent season I have to say that I could’ve done better, but I did better than the previous year. Of course, it is all just the beginning and doesn’t end with Easter, for Easter is the time of resurrection.

The next time you?re out working in your yard, ask yourself how you are preparing your life for vibrant growth. Is your life full with the love of Christ or is it lying dormant in need of some care?

God loves you immensely!

Tracie

By looking at the Christ we have our best opportunity to understand life, love, tragedy, and redemption.

The most beautiful thing we can experience is the mysterious. It is the source of all true art and science.
- Albert Einstein

Albert Einstein, one of the greatest human minds at unlocking the mysteries of creation understood the power and beauty of that which is beyond our grasp of understanding.  Maybe it was the beauty of it that kept him thinking and dreaming about the unknown and the keys that unlock the doors of understanding, one at a time.

God is the greatest of all mysteries.  This is why faith is so difficult to understand for those without its comfort.  They cannot own it, or create it with their rules;  it is Grace and this is one blessing we cannot control or enforce.  It must be
accepted then set free to bless all others.  The minute we tie it down, it is dead, ceases to exist within the borders of our laws.  If we deny others are worthy then we have killed it within our breast.  For Grace comes from the very breath of God, and as Jesus said “we cannot tell which way it will blow.”  Nor is it for us to decide.  Thank God, otherwise we would all be damned by someone!

Seriously, thank God and enjoy the mysterious Grace given to us by our Lord, the Christ.

RD

Since my last post the bruise got worse, and now it is better.  I’m still typing with one hand, still have my arm wrapped to where it isn’t bendable; but no need for pain medicine now.  Tomorrow I get this big bandage off!  It has crossed my mind that I may wish to have it put back on!  Oh well, progress is being made.

It is the Monday before Thanksgiving and Kristin has convinced me why it is necessary to begin decorating for Christmas before we’ve even had Thanksgiving.  Normally I would not allow it, but this year our schedules don’t allow another time; so the decorating has begun!

It’s all about remembering and being thankful for the memories.  I fear that in being rushed and impatient with the natural progression of time, we will forget to remember, we will allow impatience to rob us of life’s gifts.  Many will say the ability just to remember is a gift.  I like to close my eyes and try to remember back as far as I can.  There is usually something in my childhood years I can recall. No matter how faint it may be, I know the incident to be a gift.  Even in, and possibly most of all, the times I required parental correction, we’re some of the greatest gifts given because they are some of the most useful in my life’s time.  It is no different in the times since when life was most difficult.  Those are the times that either make you or break you.  When one can allow them to become gifts of strength, of faith, of wisdom and character, then one has unwrapped the gift to benefit from it’s greatest rewards.

Yesterday was our 17th anniversary.  Together we thought about our lives and the paths they had taken.  We agree we have led simple, yet extraordinary lives.  Extraordinary in the abundance of love given, the opportunities given with the greatest one being that of knowing Christ.  It is the greatest gift a parent can pass on to their child.  It is because of the knowledge of Christ’s love that we have been able to use the difficult times of marriage and use them in a positive manner.

Rick and I have been given the gift of an awesome relationship, the gift of children, grandchildren and I could go on and on.  But the greatest of all these is love.

Please take time to remember and be thankful this holiday season.

Happy Thanksgiving!!

God Bless,

Tracie

A few days sure do make for different circumstances in life.  3 weeks ago we were on our way to New Mexico.  Yesterday I had surgery!  I’ve suffered with carpal tunnel for a long time along with the ulnar nerve in my elbow.  The surgery became more involved as he cut me open to find more tissue than previously thought.  Needless say, I’m having a good amount of pain.  I also have only my left hand to use, meaning my entries will be short.  I can’t use my arm for 10 weeks!  Then I have my left arm to do.  All this means I will not be working for quite sometime.  It’s also the holidays.  It’s not presents I’m concerned about, but the decorating, cooking for family and the yearly Open House I give for my church family.  I’m going to feel the absence of those holiday joys.  However I will have the special services to enjoy, our class party, the time with family, and the experienced rebirth that comes in special celebrations of our Lord’s birth.

With the present state of the economy, the skirt of the Christmas Tree will have much less on it.  I hope we all will take advantage of the situation and fill our needs with the love of Christ rather than the loss of the material.

God Bless,
Tracie